Kahkashan Khan Blog This page is dedicated to all the art, poetry, literature, music, nature, solitude and book lovers. Do what makes your soul happy. Love and Peace. - D
Pages
▼
Monday, December 30, 2019
Wednesday, November 27, 2019
زندگی کے مطلب کے بارے میں نہیں پتا تھا
آج سے کچھ برس پہلے مجھے زندگی کے مطلب کے بارے میں نہیں پتا تھا..زندگی کیا ہے کیوں ہے کچھ اندازہ نا تھا,بس جیسے گذر رہا تھا ویسے گذار رہے تھے..بلکل ایک کٹھپتلی کی طرح!!! پھر زندگی نے اپنا موڑ لیا دنیا کے رنگ ڈھنگ ,اصلیت اور اپنا مطلب سمجھانے کے لیے گھر سے الگ کیا.. ایک ایسی نئی دنیا سے متعارف کرایا جس سے ہم بچپن سے نااشنا تھے. نئے لوگ, نئی جگہ, نئے طریقے..پُرانا تھا تو بس اپنا آپ!!! تصور کی دنیا سے حقیقی دنیا کا سفر بہت تلخ ہوتا ہے.. دوست احباب بھی تھے پر دوستی میں وہ مخلصی کہاں جو پہلے ہوا کرتی تھی .. وہ خالص چیزین اور مخلص لوگ اس دور میں رہے کہاں ہیں.پهر بهی بس دل کو تسلی دے کر اور بہِلا کر ایک دوسرے کے ساتھ اٹکے ہوئے ہیں کہ شاید اس سے بے سکونی اور بے چینی ختم ہوجائے.. شاید اسی میں سکون مل جائے.. رشتے ناتے بھی ایسے ہوگئے..اب تو گھر والوں سے بهی صرف دعا سلام ہوتی ہے اور آگے بات کرنے کے لئے کچھ نہیں ہوتا.. اورر رب؟؟؟؟؟؟ اسے تو ہم کب کا بھلا بیٹھے ہیں..اور حیرت ہے ہم نے کھبی اسے یاد کرنے کوشش ہی نہیں ..وہ ناراض هے تبھی تو زندگی میں خالی پن اور امتحان ہیں .. ہم نے کھبی اسے منانے کی کوشش ہی نہیں کی تو کیسے ہوتا کہ ہماری زندگی گلزار بن جائے؟؟ زندگی تو نام ہی ہے امتحان کا ہر گھڑی ہر لمحہ ایک امتحاں ہے.. اب یہ تو ہم پر ہے کہ ہم اس امتحاں میں کس طرح کامیاب ہوتے ہیں.. (زندگی گلزار ہوتی نہیں بنانی پڑتی ہے) خود کو پُراعتماد کرکے امتحانون کو پار کرکے اور سب سے ضروری رب پے یقین رکھ کہ.. کیونکہ جو وہاں سے دربدر ہوا اسے دنیا میں بھی در در کی ٹھوکریں ملیں گی...ایک پھول جو صرف بہار میں جینا جانتا ہو وہ گرمی سردی اور خزان میں مرجھا جاتا ہے.. اسے جینے کے لیے پھر بہار کا انتظار کرنا پڑے گا.. ہم بھی دنیا میں ایک گلستان کے پھول کی طرح ہیں..اگر ہم مشکلوں کا سامنا نہیں کرینگے اور ان سے بھاگنے کی کوشش کرینگے تو ہم بھی اس پھول کی طرح مرجھا جائینگے اور پھر زندگی تو ہوگی پر اس میں گلزار کا وجود نہیں ہوگا
معافی کا فلسفہ !
معاف کر دینے سے آپ کسی کے جرم کی توعیت کو کم نہی کر دیتے۔ معاف کرنا بس دو باتوں پر منحصر ہے۔ ایک تو یہ کہ اپنی تکلیف کا بدلہ نہ لو۔ اور دوسرا کہ اس انسان کی طرف سے اپنا دل صاف کر لو۔ کوئ بغض نہ رکھو۔
اور پھر رب کہتا ہے کہ صبر کرو۔
اگر معاف کر ہی دیا ہے تو بھول بھال کر آگے کیوں نہ بڑھ جائیں؟ دل صاف کر ہی لیا ہے تو اسے صبر پہ کیوں آمادہ کرتے رہیں؟
کیونکہ اللہ چاہتا ہے کہ تم تکلیف کو بھولتے بھولتے اپنے رب کی بڑائ حفظ کر لو۔
اللہ کہتا ہے جتنی تکلیف تم کو تمھارے مجرم سے پہنچی ہے اتنی ہی اسے واپس لوٹا دو۔ تمھے بھی میں نے ویسا ہی انسان بنایا ہے جیسا کہ تمھارے مجرم کو۔ تم کمزور نہی ہو۔ تمھارے اندر بھی وہ ساری صلاحیتیں ہیں۔ جاؤ اور اپنا بدلہ لے آؤ۔
"جبرائیل (ع): اگر آپ(ص) چاہیں تو ان لوگوں کو طائف کے دونوں پہاڑوں کے بیچ میں کچل دیا جائے گا" - رب کی طرف سے پہلی پیشکش یہی ہوتی ہے۔
اگر آپ بدلہ لینے کی ٹھان لیں تو اللہ آپ کواس کے لئے سارے ضروری وسائل اور سمجھ بوجھ دے دے گا۔
مگر پھر اللہ دیکھتا ہے کہ اس کا بندہ زیادہ زخمی ہے۔ چوٹیں گہری ہیں اور ان سے اٹھنے والی تکلیف بھی زیادہ ہے۔ اپنے معاملات کی طرح اپنے آپ کو بھی نہیں سنبھال پا رہا۔
تو پھر رب کہتا ہے کہ اپنا معاملہ میرے سپرد کردو۔ اور اپنے دل سے بدلے اور بغض کی تھکن کو دور کرو۔
تمھے آرام کی ضرورت ہے۔ تمھارے معاملات اب میری رضا سے حل ہونگے۔ اور میری رضا میں ہی تمھاری رضا ہونی چاہیئے۔ مجھے تمھاری تکلیف کا پتہ ہے۔ مجھے مت بتاؤ کہ تم اب اپنے مجرم کو کس حال میں دیکھنا چاہتے ہو۔
صبر کرو کہ اب میں اپنے بھٹکے ہوئے غلام کی رسی کو کھینچنے لگا ہوں۔ وہ بھی میرا بندہ ہے۔ میں نے اسے بھی ستر ماؤں سے زیادہ محبت دی ہے۔ میں چاہتا ہوں کہ وہ واپس میری طرف رجوع کرے۔ میں چاہتا ہوں کہ اسے آزماؤں اپنی محبت سے، اپنے خوف سے، اپنے قہر سے۔ مجھ کو پتہ ہے کہ اس کو کس طرح اور کب احساس دلانا ہے اس کے جرم کا۔ تم اس وقت کا انتظار کرو۔ جب سب آوازیں بند ہو جائیں گی اور اس کا ضمیر صرف اپنے رب کی آواز سنے گا۔
"محمد (ص) : کیا پتہ ان کی نسلوں میں سے کوئ اللہ کا نام لینے والا پیدا ہو جائے" ۔
ہاں اگر وہ میری رحمت سے دور چلا گیا ہوا تو اس کے گناہ کا اس سے بدتر بدلہ اور کیا ہو سکتا ہے کہ پھر میں اس کے دل پر مہر لگا دوں گا، نشانرہی کے لئے کہ یہ دل اب اپنے رب کی آواز نہی سن پائے گا۔ حتیٰ کہ توبہ کا وقت بھی نکل جائے گا۔
جیسے کوئ مریض اگر ہسپتال کے سٹاف کے ساتھ تعاون نہ کرے تو ہسپتال کے انچارج پھر اسے سمجھاتے ہیں۔ اگر تب بھی مریض اپنی ضد پہ قائم رہے تو اس کا علاج ممکن نہی۔
اگر تم اپنا بدلہ خود لینے نکل پڑو گے تو ممکن ہے کہ حد سے تجاوز کر جاؤ اور اپنے مجرم سمیت اللہ کے نزدیک حیثیت میں کم ہو جاؤ۔
"علی (رضی اللہ): میں تم سے زاتی دشمنی اور غصے کی بنیاد پہ نہی لڑوں گا، صرف اپنے رب کیلئے لڑوں گا"۔
لیکن پھر آپ دیکھتے ہیں کہ دنیا آپ کے مجرم کے ساتھ کھڑی ہے۔ اس کی حوصلہ افزائ کر رہی ہے۔ یہ دیکھ کے آپ کا ایمان کمزور پڑتا ہے۔ صبر ٹوٹتا ہے۔ اور رب سے شکوہ بڑھتا جاتا ہے۔
جان رکھیں ابو جہل کو بھی حوصلہ افزائ دینے والے ہزاروں میں تھے۔
اللہ اپنے ایک مجرم بندے کے ساتھ ان چند ہزار لوگوں کو بھی آزما لیتا ہے جو رب کی آواز کے ہوتے ہوئے اپنی آوازوں کا شور اس مجرم کے کانوں میں ڈالتے رہتے ہیں۔ کسی اور کے ایمان کے راستے میں مخل ہونے والے اپنی راہ بھی کھو بیٹھتے ہیں۔
جو بھی یہ شور سننے کھڑا ہو جائے گا اور جتنی دیر سنے گا، اس کا ایمان اللہ کی آواز سے مانوسیت کھو دے گا۔ اگر صبر ہی تمھارا آخری فیصلہ ہے تو پھر اللہ کی محفل میں رہو اور صرف اللہ کی باتیں سنو۔
بڑے بزرگ اکثر وہ باتیں کرتے ہیں جو اللہ آپ کو سنانا چاہتا ہے۔ وہ اکثر آپ سے کہتے ہیں نا کہ تکلیف میں زیادہ سے زیادہ استغفار پڑھیں۔انہی باتوں سے تو پتہ چلے گا کہ معاف کرنا تو رب کی صفت ہے۔ انسان کون ہوتا ہے کسی کو بھی معاف کرنے والا۔ اور اگر رب کی طرف سے آپ کو حکم ہوتا ہے کہ اس کے فلاں بندے کو معاف کردو تو کیا آپ نہی سمجھتے کہ آپ کو دنیا میں جنت کی بشارت دی گئ ہے
’ برف کے پتلے ’
اک آگ سینے میں لیے یہ برف کے پتلے پگھلتے نہیں کیوں ؟ ؟
اندر ہی تڑپتے ہیں ، مرتے ہیں ، بتاتے نہیں کیوں ؟ ؟
اپنے ہونے کے بڑے دعوے
پِھر روٹھ جائے اپنا تو مناتے نہیں کیوں ؟ ؟
خیر یہ دھوکے ہیں دکھاوے ہیں,
قصے سچے ہیں گر تو سناتے نہیں کیوں ؟ ؟
کیے وعدے وفاداری کے بہت تم نے
وفادار ہو نا تو اب نبھاتے نہیں کیوں ؟ ؟
مجھ پر الزام ازل سے تمہارا ہونے کا
تم بھی میرے ہو ؟ نہیں ، تو ہوتے نہیں کیوں؟
زندگی رنگین نہیں ہوتی
زندگی رنگین نہیں ہوتی
روشن خیالوں کی دنیا نہیں ہوتی , زندگی کو خوبصورت بنانا پڑتا ہے کچھ کو نظر انداز کرکے اور کچھ کو برداشت کرکے ... کہ اگر کوئ دل چیرنے والا جملہ بولتا ہے تو اسے درگزر کردیں اگر کوئ تکلیف دیتا ہے تو اسے برداشت کرلیں آپ کی خاموشی ہی بہترین انتقام ہے ... زندگی میں رنگ بھرنے پڑتے ہیں زندگی کو رنگین بنانا پڑتا ہے ... محبت کرکے محبت دے کے اور محبت لے کے ... اپنا اخلاق اچھا کرکے ... آپ اخلاق اچھا کرلیں گے تو آدھی مشکل آسان ہوجاۓ گی ... بس تھوڑی سی برداشت کی ضرورت ہے ... جیسے پھول خزاں کے بعد بہار کے موسم میں کھل جاتے ہیں بالکل ویسے ہی محبت دینے سے زندگی میں بہار آجاتی ہے روٹھے ہوۓ مان جاتے ہیں ... دل پگھل جاتے ہیں ... جو آنکھیں کبھی نہیں روئیں وہ بھی نم جاتی ہیں ... آپ ہمت مت ہاریں ڈٹ کر مقابلہ کریں ہر مشکل کا کیونکہ اللہ کا وعدہ ہے مشکل کے بعد آسانی ہے ... 🌸 سب کو نظر انداز کریں جو تکلیف دیتے ہیں جو دل دکھاتے ہیں ان کا معاملہ اللہ کے سپرد کردیں اللہ بہترین انصاف کرنے والا ہے آپ اخلاق اچھے کرلیں سب کو معاف کردیں پھر دیکھیں زندگی بالکل آسان اور پر سکون ہوجاۓ گی
...
Fall is not just a season.
Fall is not just a season. It's a state
A state of being empty. When everything you were trying to keep, falls from your hands just like the sand particles slipping down from your fist & like all the yellow leaves falling from the trees during autumn.
Maybe the tree itself wanted to loose all those leaves because how long can someone carry a dead thing?
How long can you water a dead plant?
How long can you keep a dead body at home?
How long can you keep a broken toy in your wardrobe?
How long can you keep the negative thoughts in your mind?
Dead plants can never return to their original state.
Dead bodies can only begin to decay and produce smell.
Broken toys can only take space where you can easily make room for new things.
Negative thoughts can only contaminate your thoughts where you can easily accumulate good wishful thoughts.
Maybe when Prophet P. B.U.H was talking about cleanliness that it's half of our Deen, he meant to refer towards our thoughts too. Because what we do is a direct reflection of what we think.
The Idea of being ‘unapologetic’ about things in my opinion is a little flawed.
The Idea of being ‘unapologetic’ about things in my opinion is a little flawed.
We all must promote sane and civilised behaviours rather than liberalising in the fictitious realm of being ‘you’, illnesses being exclusionary.
You cannot literally choose to get away with bad behaviours, being inconsiderate, being immoral and stubborn just because you’ve been taught to be ‘unapologetically’ you. I think you should be apologetic for things that you can change and posses the responsibility of, you cannot depart from taking responsibility for every time you ridicule or scorn someone because of your impulsive trigger, you cannot depart from taking responsibility for every time you pass an unethical sensual remark because you’re bawdy, you cannot depart from taking responsibility of your rage because you have anger issues, you cannot depart from taking responsibility of your obscene language because you’re foul-mouthed, you cannot depart from taking responsibility of physical abuse because you rage violently, you cannot depart from taking responsibility of your last minute cancellations because you posses a dilatory attitude, you cannot depart from taking responsibility of your offensive mockery because you’re humorous, you cannot depart from taking responsibility for every time you discredit someone you’re volatile and moody, you cannot depart from taking responsibility of being wasteful about; food and lavishing because you’re extravagant.
You without exceptions must be apologetic about your intentional inadequacies for externalities you create out of being pseudo ‘Yourself’ cost the rest.
Monday, November 11, 2019
I don't like to stay in touch with people
I don't like to stay in touch with people, comes an awful feeling when I've had to interact.
Because, I've always felt that the people are not serious with themselves, so how they will be with me? People, has been disappointing me, for what they do in the world.
And, I see people claiming that not [all are same] but it's not that way. I accept that [they] actually care for each other or even share feelings. But what I ask is [don't we at the end of the day finish disappointing each other.] So being strangers to each other and yet sharing respect isn't better than getting close, living the life for a specific moment and then meaning absolutely nothing to each other.
I don't know why people aren't comforted with silence and crave for stuff to take place.
I mean, how on earth you chose drama over peace. Noise over silence. People over loneliness.
I say, [sit] Not with someone who completes you, rather sit alone and have courage to complete you [yourself], read as much as you can. Be quiet, don't speak much. Don't react to everything, instead let go, [let go] and free your mind from unnecessary stuff which has nothing to do except bothering you. Spend time thinking about the [nature] and mostly spend time with yourself. Feel your soul, let your mind wander, let yourself live!
Ask yourself this question every day 👍.
A person who is always criticising no matter what you do they always something bad to tell you is a very bad company to keep . It just take few meetings for you to take their habits and even you try you will have them anyways because they will give you their own excuses why they are right and you will fall for it eventually . Try to be away from those as much as possible and be a Good version of yourself Good people will come to you or if not then the bad person will come to you for changing themselves . So what if everybody have a best friend to keep and you don't it doesn't matter as long as you are satisfied with the person you are becoming . Instead of finding faults in otherd try to find yourself see which of your faults are hurting others .Even though God has promised to reward us for our good deeds and bad . But if you are Atheist so what have you never heard of Karma your all good and deeds will be rewarded in this life forget after life if you don't believe in it . Life is not as hard as everybody says it's easy if you make it easy . Find bad things in yourself and Good in others . Some people says that we are being honest for telling them their faults so that they can change nobody asked you for it and its not your job as well .
We as young people in our twenties are in the phase
We as young people in our twenties are in the phase of life when we are being handed over responsibilities and are expected to handle them well along with surviving in our educational and other personal affairs.
Most of us carry our problems and hardships with us everywhere and keep thinking about them all the time. What this does is get us mentally fatigued and we fail to perform other chores. We do not seem as happy as we used to be before. We become gloomy. These mountains become our excuse to avoid friends and moments of rejoicing. We avoid being happy and cheerful. We keep these heavy mountains on our head.
One thing we should keep in mind is that life is never going to be easy. There will be ups and downs and we have to go through the downs as well. So its better we go through them with a smile and even if not a smile then atleast with peace. A student getting tensed about studies should thank Allah that he has studies to care about and is not among those who cant afford education. Similarly a person getting tensed about issues of his agricultural land should thank Allah for the tiny problems he is facing because if he did not have the land he would not be facing these problems and for sure won't be enjoying the land that he has at the moment. A man worried about providing his kids and wife with facilities should be thankful that he has his family to care for unlike many others couple who cant conceive. Distress never solves problems, it worsens them. Dont take me wrong. I dont mean that we should not worry about things but there is surely a limit for everything. For once lets let go of these mountains. We were never supposed to carry them on our heads. We were supposed to climb them and create great name for ourselves and succeed in life. The sooner we realize this and let go of our tension and anxities the better we are. We should not keep thinking about our problems and make them a mountain for us. In the end it all passes away so why dont we smile as long as we pass through these dark forests of hardships and be a tiny shining firefly that fly across them spreading light.
"Rain"
Have you seen the beauty ,
Beauty of what? beauty of rain!
When the showers sprinkle the street,
And flowers are ready to greet,
The dark clouds at the sky,
And the lightning as a treat!
Don't they give you inner joy?
Raindrops from the upper sky,
Falling on the cars and homes,
Giving you moments to enjoy!
When it falls in the fields,
It strengthen the roots,
When it falls in gardens,
It freshens the flowers!
This lovely,wonderful rain,
The source to ease your pain.
There are some things
There are some things, some relations that we know they are gonna end. If not today, maybe tomorrow. But we know that they are gonna end up, for this situation we have two choices, to hold on or to let go. Letting go before it hurts too bad or holding on until it tears you apart, until it shatters you, until it wrecks you. Yet we choose to hold on, because letting go of something that we wished for, that means the world to us isn't easy. Holding on is destroying us whereas letting go would kill me, and I have no clue what to do next.
----I'm staying until it breaks me.//
One of these days we'll surely meet.
#Random_write-ups
#blurred_thoughts
One of these days we'll surely meet. On a random, hot, humid day as we're hustling about the city running errands. Me, on my way to pick up my kid from school. You, on the way to your doctor to get the routine check up for your diabetes. Or vice versa.
And as our tired eyes meet, time will stop in its' track. With one screeching loud hard brake. And everything around will suddenly become a blurry whirlwind, with us in its' centre. The myriad of emotions will run in a wild frenzy. Jumping from recognition to betrayal. To shattered dreams. To predominantly love. Love that once made us whole. Love that didn't want to be shared, but had to. Love and dreams that gave up on themselves and eventually surrendered to reality, after a long standing fight.
With a wry smile at the corner of your mouth, you might ask "How're you?". And as I'll stupidly nod my head, I'll be wondering at the tuft of emotions balling up in my throat making my speech difficult. From the deep plunge my senses took down the memory lane. Memories of how it felt to weave my fingers in yours', how it felt to be in your embrace, the tinkling sound of our laughters as we laughed at our lame ass jokes.
I'll be aching to know many things. Are you happy now? Can you sleep peacefully at night, knowing what you did? Breaking my trust? Knowing very well how it'll wreck me? Do our memories torture you at night, like they do to me? Do you feel the slightest iota of guilt, knowing that you hit me precisely where it hurts? Do you realise that you took a part of myself along with you when you left? The part that I haven't yet retrieved.
But sadly, I'll fail to coax my vocal cords into forming anything remotely audible or sensible. I'll simply stand there, staring blankly at your eyes. Through your eyes. For a while, before I turn my back and walk away. With shaky legs. With a heart beating dangerously fast, to remind me of the love that remained long after its' owner fled.
وہ ایسی ہی تھی دنیا سے ناراض،
وہ ایسی ہی تھی دنیا سے ناراض، روشنیوں سے خفا، رنگوں سے کوفت رکھنے والی، وہ ہر وقت نہیں روتی تھی، آنسووں کو دل کے راستے اتار دینے والی تھی، بس جب آنکھوں کے کٹورے پانی جمع کرتے کرتے بےحساب ریلے سے ابل پڑتے تو چند قطرے آنکھوں کے آس پاس کی زمین کو بھگو دیتے، آنسووں کو پینے اذیت کو ہضم کرنے، تکلیف کی شدت کو جذب کرتے کرتے وہ ادھ موئی ہوگئی تھی، ورنہ اللہ نے اسے بہت پیارا بنا کر بھیجا تھا، بات کرتے کرتے جب جملے کچھ دیر کو ادھورے رہ جائیں، کچھ لمحے خاموشی کے بعد بےترتیب لفظوں سے مزین بھاری آواز سنائی دے، ایسے لمحوں کی تکلیف حد سے سوا ہوتی ہے، وہ ایسی تھی درد کی شدتوں سے واقف، ایسی لڑکی کو کون چاہتا ہے؟ چاہ کر بھی کون نباہ کرتا ہے، اپنی روشنی واپس لے جاؤ کہ ہمارے لئے فقط اندھیرے بنائے گئے تھے
!!
Friday, November 8, 2019
Monday, November 4, 2019
Wednesday, October 30, 2019
Tuesday, October 29, 2019
میں تو اپنے ہونٹوں پہ لیے مسکان کھڑا تھا
میں تو اپنے ہونٹوں پہ لیے مسکان کھڑا تھا
پھر عکس کیوں آئینے میں پریشان کھڑا تھا؟
ذندگی دنیا کے رواجوں میں گزر رہی تھی
خدا تب یاد آیا جب سامنے طوفان کھڑا تھا
تم نے بھی ہنستی ہوئی تصویر پہ اعتبار کر لیا؟
نہ سمجھا کہ اس میں بکھرا ہوا انسان کھڑا تھا
جس کانچ کے دل کو رکھ کر تم نے پتھر کے خواب دیکھے
اس کے ٹوٹ جانے پر کیوں اب حیران کھڑا تھا؟
اپنی بےوفائی کو مجبوریوں کا رنگ دے کر
کتنی ہمت سے وہ خوبرو بےایمان کھڑا تھا
میرے اشعار کو فقط خیالات جانا اس نے
سب جان کر وہ کیسے انجان کھڑا تھا
ندی کے اس پار بھی کسی کی خاموشی چیختی تھی
شاید اس پار بھی مجھ سا کوئی نعمان کھڑا تھا
Monday, October 28, 2019
دنیا کو خوش کرنے کے لیے کبھی بھی رب کی نافرمانی نہ کریں
دنیا کو خوش کرنے کے لیے کبھی بھی رب کی نافرمانی نہ کریں___ یقین جانیے___ جس دنیا کو خوش کرنے کے لیے اُس ذاتِ برحق کو اور اسکے احکامات کو بھول جاتے ہیں____ وہی دنیا آپ کو ایک ہی پل میں پستیوں میں جا پھینکتی ہے___ ____
!یہ دنیا کسی کی قدر نہیں کرتی___وللہِ نہیں کرتی
اس لیے اس ذات کی بات کو فوقیت دیں جو 'قدردان' ہے___ آپ ناقدری سے بچا لیے جائیں گے
__!
اللہ پاک ہماری رہنمائی فرمائے آمین
___!
Sunday, October 27, 2019
موسم نے بدلنا شروع کر دیا ہے
سُنو
،موسم نے بدلنا شروع کر دیا ہے
اب آسمان کو شام کی چادر اوُڑھنے کی بہت جلدی ہونے لگی ہے۔۔۔
آہستہ آہستہ... راتیں طویل ہو جائیں گی اور دن چھوٹے
جاڑے کی رات
!......تم جانتے ہو نا
کیسی خاموشی اور ویرانی ہوتی ہے ان راتوں میں
کیا کرؤ گے تم
جب یہ خامشی تمہارے اندر شور کرے گی تو؟؟؟
اپنےگھر کی چھوٹی سی دیوار پر بیٹھ کر
جب تم زمین کو دیکھو گے تو کس سے گفتگو کرو گے؟؟
جب تمہیں اپنے دل کی دھڑکن صاف سُنائی دے گی تو کیا اُس میں میرا نام نہ ہو گا؟؟؟
سُنو
اس بار تم مجھ سے نہیں
بلکہ اس بار تم میری
....باتیں کرنا
فضا میں گونجتی اس خاموشی کو
تم ہماری داستان سُنانا
لازوال محبت کی داستان
!!......بے مثال ہجر کی داستان
Thursday, October 24, 2019
Love, the second most deadful poison in the world,
Love, the second most deadful poison in the world, happens to sweet hearted people within moments without being thought; following this killer, many people lost their existence in its haze and mislaid their hearts without hope of finding those again !!
Sanam was one of those people who found love the intoxicating and became addicted to it. But, remorsefully saying, addiction took her to the morass of sorrows, tears, and enduring restlessness. She became silent for rest of her life giving up the hope of spending tremendous life again after its failure. She started weeping for nights throwing her body over her bed as her body was not left with stamina to sustain such painful separation. She felt like a little child lost in crowd and no one was there to help her out from the killer web of incomplete tormenting love.
Once a friend of Sanam wrote a letter to her lover for her dismal and vulnerable position asking him to come back and save her life as he was wholly and solely cure for Sanam's suffering.
It was inscribed, "The time you left her, she remained with only grief of separation from your soul, lasts up to now, as she deemed it was only your heart where she wanted to live till her last breath. But you, like this brutal world, killed her soul snatching it from the soul of her paramour, you.
Alas! She died, but her body is still suffering!!! You Killed her!!!"
While reading the letter, he started weeping; but his constraints did not allow him to go to Sanam. He at first instance wrote reply to her friend that he could not come and advised her to advise Sanam not to commit such childlike acts and be a practical women. He uttered bluntly, love has nothing to do with real life, it is just surreal and nothing more than this !!! But, love is such disease that catapults its victim to depth of nostalgia and urges him or her forget all practical, professional, personal, familial life and all that !!
When Sanam came to know about the candid reply of her only love, she felt like that her respiration system started to stop gradually and she became deadbody uttering name of her lover at last with mouth of broken heart.
The day she died was very terrible in the history of love because the separation took place in very strange way, it penetrated itself amongst love, Sanam, and her paramour devastating their souls, crumbling their existences into tiny irreversible pieces, crushed their hearts under its gigantic feet, and divided them. Those, all enormous, came in shape of constraints of the world: familial enforcement of responsibilities, financial stability, and above all the fear of masses because of the way they treat love; nothing was there to make that couple to make love forever but the only way, sanam's paramour was left with, was to go to the place where sanam's soul may be found.
Uff! Love leaded her to demise, but finally, she was acquitted from torment...!!!
One day you're barely 11 years old,
One day you're barely 11 years old, living in narrow undulating street full of mediocre homes, playing country stop in the scorching summer noon with a dozen other mini humans like you. Sweat running down your face, dust and dirt in your hair, many small abrasions on your feet from the vicious stampede of the game, you don't stop until the curfew starts descending upon the destructive party and one by one, you all start slipping home avoiding the murderous glare of your mother's who are going to have to clean you, the clothes you destroyed and the mess you will be making while you clean up. You never really think there's more to life, you never even assume that someday this will feel like ages ago and not at all enough. You simply tidy up, finish your homework and jump the TV remote and thus begins the battle of "which is more important, dad's news, mom's sappy Indian soap or your favorite cartoon." We know whoever wins, won't be us. So when we lie down to sleep in our beds, shift the pillow to the foot end because that's where the fan is all we think of is to become a grown up, so we can play with the big kids, so we can win the channel war, so we can escape all the injustices of being a child.. And as this thought gets confused with the onset of meaningless dreams we doze off.
This keeps happening until one day it doesn't. That one day you're 3 months shy of a new decade and one month away from turning 23, you've seen falling outs, betrayals, loss, highs lows, in between, happiness and combinations of it all. You've become a professional, you have been through the phase of realizing how people you thought would never let you down will because they are human and so will you. The sibling who annoyed you has moved out. There was a time you had one room and too many of you and suddenly the house is full of rooms but not enough people to fill one of those. Your parents are becoming fragile from the thought of sending all of you away, from not being able to get rid of you even in the bathroom to not being able to see your for months on end. Your busy schedule keeps you distracted from seeing the wheel of time moving and the book of life turning pages.
Mostly you even fail to notice the seasons go by, until there's this one night... When somewhere in a city far from home, you're sitting in the open, admiring the starlit sky and the bone chilling wind hits you. But with that wind, there's realization of how far you've come, and how mundane you've become. An adult who wears laughter on the sleeve but phobias in deep. You're on the verge of two worlds, where you don't want to become a stoke in the wheel that replaces your parents but you don't want to be stuck in neverland as the child who never grew up. That is when you know it's real, life just happened to you without you ever noticing it. That's when you find out that everything has evolved to engulf you in this series of events you have absolutely no control over. The time you spent moping over what you lost was the time, when you were slowly losing what you had.
There's a song called "Breathe" that goes like this "... because we can't jump the tracks, we're like cars on a cable and life's like an hourglass glued to the table..." Life really is like an hourglass glued to the table and we spend all of it trying to turn it around instead of savoring every particle of sand that falls in down until its too late. Until you see that the picture you thought would never change has become something entirely else. And it's beautiful, the way it all shaped out like a fine sculptor's handiwork, hence in that moment of cognizance you stand in awe of this phenomenon called life understanding you have no control whatsoever and growing up was an artistic masterpiece coming into being in the most trivial of manners. Grasping this, you jump from one abyss of transition to the other with all the baggage of the process that brought you here in anticipation of all the baggage that you will further have to bear. But before you jump, just take a moment to stand in the sideline of these events unfolding and watch how magical our apparently ordinary and boring is.
Maybe all you ever need is just a walk full of meaningful
Maybe all you ever need is just a walk full of meaningful silence with someone so dear to your heart. Enjoying the cold weather, and holding warm cup of coffees in your hands. Taking glances at the sky full of clouds every now and then.. maybe that’s all you need. Maybe that’s your detox from all the sadness that has been eating away your heart..
maybe..
I see water bringing barrens back to life,
I see water bringing barrens back to life,
Whether Neglected or forgotten,
Permanently rough, silent or stangnant,
I see water bringing them back to life...!
Drop by drop pouring over,
Turning sandy cracks into mud,
Blooming flowers from their bud,
Leading its role as natures builder...!
Patiently healing earthly wound,
Tenderly softening up the ground,
Creating a chance for the stems,
To push their way up into blossomed gems...!
Such a mighty role it plays,
Quenching all the thirst away,
Enshrouding them in such a way,
Ensuring they live through it and stay...!
So flowers for your beauty princess,
And Fruits for your sacrifices,
Water made them feel alive,
Like water, you were my life!
Like water, I couldn't hold you!
Some days back I read somewhere on Facebook
Some days back I read somewhere on Facebook ”its just me or someone else has set the pattern of dua in their prayer which they go on without giving it a thought or changing it” suddenly, my heart skipped a beat as I feel follicle on my skin gave me a strange feeling of erection and in my mind hurried all those prayers where uncountable tears rolled down to my eyes onto the prayer mat while making dua for you, for your happiness, for you sadness to extinct, for your pain to end as there were no day you felt like you've been sad for, I prayed for your health and for everything for you. You actually break me the way I lost words to explain what damage you have done to me but to this point, I don't know why whenever I raise my hands for prayer I still do pray for you!!! It's a habit, a pattern and I'm really really proud of my self that I still do care for you, pray for you and love you with all my sharrted heart. Now sometimes It really doesn't matter what you did to me because all that matters is ”i still love you” and I think there will always a portion of my heart which will love you till the last breath. Might be possible that in the cascade of life and things changing positions I neglect your thought but there will always a second of a day that will reach to my mind which will recall your memories.
YOU WILL ALWAYS STAY IN MY HEART!
I often find myself whispering silently
I often find myself whispering silently, " I love you " wishing that the cruel winds of Autumn would convey these words to you. In my heart, your memories tastes of an old trauma.
I'm trying to remember how to call you mine, once again. I've spread my arms, again, to welcome sadness, in the name of love.
You told me once that I should think about myself in the first place, but how do you expect me not to think about you when you reflect in the broken pieces of me.
I'm Autumn, not because I fall everytime you leave but because I forgive you for forgetting me and allowing me to fall. I'm still holding broken pieces of myself, trying to hope that this time Autumn will be kind and would not allow me to fall.
My love, I've given to you the land of mine; my heart. But jaana, does your heart ache too with the arrival of Autumn as mine does?
-
سورۃ النساء آیت نمبر ١
اے لوگو! اپنے رب سے ڈرو جس نے تمہیں ایک جان سے پیدا کیا اور اسی جان سے اس کا جوڑا بنایا اور ان دونوں سے بہت سے مرد اور عورتیں پھیلائیں، اس اللہ سے ڈرو جس کا واسطہ دے کر تم ایک دوسرے سے اپنا حق مانگتے ہو اور رشتہ داری کے تعلقات کو بگاڑنے سے بچو، بے شک اللہ تم پر نگرانی کر رہا ہے
...!!! 💕
سورۃ النساء آیت نمبر ١
Sunday, October 20, 2019
Elsewhere there are no mobile phones.
Elsewhere there are no mobile phones. Elsewhere sleep is deep and the mornings are wonderful. Elsewhere art is endless, exhibitions are free and galleries are open twenty-four hours a day. Elsewhere everybody is as welcoming as they would be if you would come home after a very long time away and they would really missed you. Elsewhere there are no religions. Elsewhere there are no borders. Elsewhere nobody is a refugee or an asylum seeker whose worth can be decided about by a government. Elsewhere nobody is something to be decided about by anybody. Elsewhere there are no preconceptions. Elsewhere all wrongs are righted. Elsewhere the supermarkets don’t own us. Elsewhere we use our hands for cups and the rivers are clean and drinkable.
Elsewhere we do time differently. Every time I travel, I head for it. Every time I come home, I look for it.
Tuesday, October 15, 2019
Water does not resist.
“Water does not resist. Water flows. When you plunge your hand into it, all you feel is a caress. Water is not a solid wall, it will not stop you. But water always goes where it wants to go, and nothing in the end can stand against it. Water is patient. Dripping water wears away a stone. Remember that, my child. Remember you are half water. If you can't go through an obstacle, go around it. Water does.”
I've been reading
I've been reading "the faker you are, the bigger your circle will be" everywhere.
But isn't it something like the more good your heart is, the more helping you are, the more you love & take care of everyone, the more respectful you are, the more people can share their hearts out, the more people love spending time with you, the more bigger your circle will be and the more people would like to be friends with you?
You can never serve everyone but why'd people not like you for being nice, for having their best interest at heart?!
Just asking!
An open letter to the love of my life:
An open letter to the love of my life:
**You** are my Paradise,
Because you make me feel alive,
There are many reasons that I can concise,
To tell you that my love is not fragile,
You are the story I want to write,
That gives your heart a little more delight,
Just after a little span of time, I realize,
My love has grown and is much intensifies,
For me, you are my heart's pride,
I will carry you, and we will make it to the skies,
Can I ask you a favor that is wise?
Can I have you for the rest of my life?
-From a girl who'll love you like no one can ever love and no one ever will.
"AUTUMN"
Walking on a lane covered with burnt-orange leaves,⠀⠀⠀
Looking high up to see the bare branches on trees. ⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀
The autumn leaves make a rustle when stepped on. ⠀⠀⠀⠀
The chirping bird sings a meloncholic song. ⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀
The vibe of autumn may seem grievous and bland, ⠀⠀⠀
But, this saddening spell is the spring's melody;⠀⠀
Fall turns the oak trees gold by its magic-wand. ⠀⠀
⠀⠀
The hazel leaves of maple resemble a clover leaf;⠀⠀
A sign of good luck, a sign of arriving spring. ⠀⠀
After the stay of autumn; so brief.⠀⠀
⠀⠀
The leaves end their lives and dropout,⠀⠀
Giving new buds a chance to sprout! ⠀⠀
⠀⠀
Fall is the prelude of revival and rebirth,⠀⠀
Misty, gloomy days are proceeded by mirth.⠀
As I aimlessly dwell into contemplating
As I aimlessly dwell into contemplating, thoughts harassing, clouding and flooding the capacity of brain. As I muse on the verse ‘If it’s yours it will come back to you’, consoling the lovers and hopeless. I morosely cast aspersions on, will you really come back to me, do I really just let you roam, do I not care about how you’re doing the days, do I not thrive to get you, do I not endure for you, do I not suffer for you, will you still come back if I don’t yearn for you, will you still come back If I don’t fight for you, will you still come back if I don’t athirst for you. If you will, I will let you roam, I will let you indulge in the vices of your pleasure, I will let you wander through the naked streams, I will let you see the brim of the day alone, I will let you advance beyond the boundaries of decorum, for after all if you’re mine you’ll come back to me.
Then I am stricken by the contradiction that says ‘Fight for what you love’ this kindles the fire in me to go ruthless, rough and fierce. This incites the courageousness in me and rave my ownership of you, for I love you, for my heart calls you mine. For I am told fortune and love favours the brave, for if I don’t rage my life at stake for you, I don’t really deserve you. For I should do any thing and everything for you, go above and beyond the call of duty, for you.
Yet, I am scared stiff, my beloved. I am afraid for I will fight for you till the end of time, until this blood and your name runs through my veins, I am serene as I empty, deplete and drain myself for you. I am thankful to the stars as I stand vulnerable against the hostile shackles of the ocean in search of you, you and only you. I am still afraid in my ardour beloved, If destiny deprives me of you, for after all the swords I cross for you If I get told ‘it wasn’t meant for you’.
Knowing the truth and still acting
Knowing the truth and still acting like an idiot just to ignore the drama and fake reasons to cover the lie?
People may call you an idiot some may even call you that you’re weak even your close ones but you’re the strongest one yeah maybe idiot with strong intellect!
If saving your relation with someone makes you an idiot so be a proud one because people need a reason to leave even they tried to hurt your feelings for fun!
Be the person who can proudly say that I was not the one to end it, I was the one who saved it or at least tried to save it but if the things doesn’t work then don’t destroy your mental health don’t hate yourself for being too kind to someone who only need you when there’s no one! You should be your only priority because in the end of the day you have to teach your heart that nothing is permanent not even you. The only thing which is permanent is a small act of kindness for which you’ll be remembered for long time.