When I look back to all the decisions I made I literally regret NOTHING AT ALL. I did what's best for me, I stopped for a moment and took all the time I needed to find myself, motivate it and fall in love with it along the way. I reminded myself of my own worth, I picked myself up and got up stronger, more determinate than ever and I'm proud of myself for that. I'm proud that I had enough courage to punch back and say no I don't belong to that place. I'm proud because I ignored others opinions and did what I believed in. I'm proud because I assumed every decision I made. I'm proud because most people thought that taking a break from everything is nothing but a waste of time yet, I didn't listen to their crap and did what made me comfortable. I'm proud because I went through a lot of bad days and at first, it felt like everything was falling apart, like pieces will never fall into their places, like everything is so dark and depressing but here I am today feeling happy and proud and confident again because I reminded myself that my mind is a powerful thing and that the way I talk to myself and the way I see myself can make all the difference. In the end of the day, nothing lasts forever, not even our darkest days.
Kahkashan Khan Blog This page is dedicated to all the art, poetry, literature, music, nature, solitude and book lovers. Do what makes your soul happy. Love and Peace. - D
Sunday, December 2, 2018
I bet you keep asking yourself why you're the only
I bet you keep asking yourself why you're the only one who doesn't feel like she belongs to that place? Why everything seems so easy for everyone else except for you? Why you're the only one who's losing control? But guess what? YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE. Every single person is going through the same things you're going through or even worse but most people just don't want to show that hidden part of them. Most people don't share their failures, their moments of doubt, their disappointments and their worries with you. Most people don't tell you about the all battles they've been through nor their darkest times. So, WOMAN UP and grow through what you're going through. You're capable of more than you know.
There are days when you just want to lay
There are days when you just want to lay in bed all day long and do nothing. There are days when you feel tired of everything, tired of nothing. There are days when you doubt things and people and even your own self. There are days when you feel consumed by every single thing that's happening around you. But none of these things will stay forever, some days are just bad days, that's all.
میں بہت بے تکی سی لڑکی ہوں
میں بہت بے تکی سی لڑکی ہوں
اکثر ہی انکھ میں کاجل پھیلا کر رکھتی ہوں
مجھ میں ایسا کوئی سلیقہ نہیں
جس کی مثال دی جا سکے
میرا بستر بہت بے ترتیب رہتا ہے
چادر پر پڑی سلوٹیں
ماتھے کی سلوٹوں سے کہیں زیادہ گہری ہیں
میں اکثر لکھنے کو ڈائری اور پین خریدتی ہوں
اور اسکے بعد فقط دو چار صفحہ لکھ کر
ایک نئی ڈائری لے لیتی ہوں
کئی دن گزرنے پر مجھے یکدم یاد آتا ہے
کتنے دن سے میرے بال الجھے ہیں
ناخن بھی تراشنے والے ہیں
یکدم کسی دن میں سنورتی ہوں سجتی ہوں
پھر بجھ سی جاتی ہوں
میں بہت بے ترتیب لڑکی ہوں
میرے سرہانے کتابیں رسالے ڈائریاں
ایسے بکھری رہتی ہیں گویا
میری ساتھی یہی ہیں
اب تو وقت کے ساتھ دوا کی شیشی بھی ساتھ ہوتی ہے
مجھ میں کوئی سلیقہ کوئی ترتیب نہیں ہمدم
مگر
محبت جب بھی کرتی ہوں
بہت سلجھا کر رکھتی ہوں
بہت ہی پاس رکھتی ہوں
مگر جب الجھ جاوں ۔۔۔۔سمجھ لینا
محبت چھوڑ بیٹھی ہوں
عجب بے تکی سی لڑکی ہوں
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