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Sunday, March 18, 2018

I can't keep them down.


I can't keep them down. The voices, the sounds, the agony the pain. My thoughts are chasing me, and I can't outrun them. The monsters keep whispering, they are feeding off of me. My insecurities, and my fears. My pain and my dreams. I can't sleep can't you see. It's not my dissatisfaction that's causing this. It's my certainty that I am not enough. That whatever I do is enough. I am drowning in my thoughts. Screaming, shouting, yet you can't hear me. I guess, my mask keeps the murky waters hidden, and my glasses keep my dull eyes forbidden. Forbidden for you to see, to judge. I am done with judgements, and I am done with people telling me it's my fault. Can't you see, they are slowly killing me. And when I am actually dead, you will also blame me, for not trying to tell you, but I clinged. I clinged to your hand cause I thought it was light to lure me out of my darkness. But you refused to even give me the simple luxury of that.


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