What a strange thing is loneliness, and how frightening it is. We never allow ourselves to get too close to it and if by chance we do, we quickly run away from it. We will do anything to escape from loneliness, to cover it up. Avoiding and overcoming loneliness are equally futile, though suppressed or neglected, the pain, the problem, is still there. You may lose yourself in a crowd, and yet be utterly lonely, you may be intensely active, but loneliness silently creeps upon you, put
the book down, and it is there. Amusements and drinks cannot drown loneliness, you may temporarily evade it, but when the laughter and the effects of coffee are over, the fear of loneliness returns. You may be ambitious and successful, you may have vast power over others, you may be rich in knowledge, you may worship and forget yourself in the rigmarole of rituals, but do what you will, the ache of loneliness continues. You may exist only for your family, for the master, for the expression of your talent, but like the darkness, loneliness covers you. You may love or hate, escape from it according to your temperament and psychological demands, but loneliness is there, waiting and watching, withdrawing only to approach again.
This despair can never be dissolved through escape, but only by observing it.
- K
No comments:
Post a Comment